The Great Excel Senate Debate Thingy
by T.R. Fanatic
Summary: What really happened in Excel's mind in episode 2. Let your mind go, and the insanity will kick in! Updated! Now super absorbent!


T.R.: ...(is in denial while buring the 'script formatted' version of this fic.) What script format? I-I don't see any script... This? Oh, it's only homework...

The Great Excel Senate Debate Thingy

by: T.R. Fanatic

**Oh, it's that thing with the Disclaimer and the I-don't-own-Excel-Saga-or-the-characters stuff like that...**

...Moving on.

**We interrupt this broadcast of _Lost Desperate Housewives_ _in the City _to bring you a pointless meeting.**

**We now go live inside Excel's mind. As you can see (?), it looks like the Senate Floor, but every Senator is an Excel... Which is just creepy.**

Excel # 1 banged the gavel to get the other Excels' attention (not that it mattered). "Alright, listen up!" she ordered. "We have a new assignment from the head Excel herself!"

_"Excel_ Excel?" Excel # 77 asked.

"That's right!"

Excel # 12 asked, "Who's that?"

"She sounds scary!" Excel # 90 remarked.

"I'm hungry!" Excel # 45 whimpered, her tummy growling.

Excel # 1 banged the gavel again. "Shut up, # 45!" she ordered as a screen came down behind her showing a picture of a strange silver gun. "Our objective today is to figure out from whom this powerful weapon belongs to. Since I am the only SANE Excel here, I must say that this weapon came from Mars and will bring about death and destruction to the entire city if we're not careful!"

"YEAH!" cheered # 38. "Total obliteration!"

"Now, I will open the floor to any Excel that wishes to speak." # 1 added.

# 7 quickly shot her hand in the air.

"Your thoughts, # 7?"

"I like Pocky!" replied # 7.

"I'm hungry!" whimpered # 45 again.

"You're outta line, # 45!" # 60 barked.

"No, you are!" # 2 belted to #60 before breaking out into a fist fight.

"HAIL ILPALAZZO!" cheered # 37.

"It's not time yet!" replied # 10.

The camera randomly pans to Excel # 41, who is singing a really bad and off-key version of 'Reckless Fire.' **1**

"The great Excel # 13 has a plan!" cheered the cursed Excel.

"Really?" # 1 asked.

"I, Excel # 13, will take up a hobby of collecting forks, travel to the Manor and take up assassination training from a mother-like priestess in which I'll come back as a cold-blooded maiden of the Soldats with a very bad sense and taste for fashion!" **2**

"I told you not to tell her, Kirika." Excel # 12 muttered. **2**

"Shut up, Mireille!" Kirika (a.k.a. Excel # 14) barked before she and # 12 (a.k.a. Mireille) broke out into a gun battle... While #13 stared intently at a fork she found.** 2**

The camera pans off again... now looking at Excel # 25, playing with an electronic handheld game. "I'm gonna win this time..." she hissed. "I'm gonna... YES! High score!"

The camera shifts and goes to Excel # 44 who watches intently at a cooking show on a portable TV. "YEAAAH!" she cheered. "Take that, you delicious, edible mutt! BAM!"

"Excel," the Excel next door called to # 1. "Excel is taunting Excel. And Excel is hungry!"

The camera then goes off and flims Excel # 83 as she reads a romance novel starring her and... well, Ilpalazzo, of course.

The camera jumps over to Excel # 67 who is scribbling on a piece of paper while singing: "SHADE, SHADE, SHADE! WE LOVE TO SHAAAADE!"

The singing was quickly drowned out by Excel # 26's loud snoring.

At a distance, we see Excel # 50 sitting cross-legged, meditating. "ACROSS will rule the city..." she whispered. "Total conquest... Absolute control..."

The camera moves to the lifeless chair belonging to Excel # 101. In her place, the wooden mannequin holds a sign: "On Vacation, back later."

...While a labcoat-clad Excel # 98 levels off different fluids in different beakers "I wonder," she muttered. "through the power of precise scientific calculations, perfect chemistry, human transmutations through alchemy (**3**)and a variety of ninjitsu spells (**4**), if I would be able to clone myself?"

The watch on Excel # 100's wrist rings, signaling only one thing... "LUNCH BREAK!"

"LUNCH BREAK?" The other 99 Excels asked before exploding into cheers.

"I'm hungry!" # 45 stated.

**We now take you live to Excel's room.**

Where we find Excel (Excel _Excel,_ that is.) deep in thought. _Could that mean that this weapon is from... ACROSS?_ she thought. "Excel analysis is complete!" **5**

"Arrrr..." whimpered Menchi. (Translation: Took ya long enough!)

"A vote of 99 brain cells against one say this is a secret weapon made by ACROSS!"

"Arr arrooo..." (Translation: Oh, brother...)

**Fanfiction (insert random number here): The Great Excel Senate Debate Thingy**

**Today's Experiment...**

**Crap, it's a deadlock! 50 brain cells against another 50. We'll get back to you, okay?**

Footnotes, or Other DISCLAIMERS That should be mentioned! **1.** The Opening Song 'Reckless Fire,' belongs to S-cry-ed... I don't own it! **2. **All the main characters that belong to my favorite show: Noir... But, I don't own them. **3. and 4. **Fullmetal Alchemist and Naruto... I do not own either of them! **5. **Random footnote: insert words here! And... I don't own that, either! ...Wait, do I?

T.R.: And that's the second fic I wrote in a day. If you've read "Why Did Excel Cross the Road?" that was the first one. Now, my mind has officially warped!


End file.
